UK > America

To my, and most of the heterosexual female population of the world's demise, this fine specimen of a man will be taken off the market this Friday at 11 am UK time (no fear, the bar may still be open at 3 am in Chicago for those who wish to drown their sorrows). As many of you may not know, I love England. I visited there when I was 16 years old with my family and fell in love with it. London is like a laid back, more hip New York that still manages to be luxurious and posh, without being too pretentious. If you think about it, everything that is British is better:

1. UK Skins: The characters are so much more attractive, use fabulous slang, do whatever the fuck they want and look utterly badass. The soundtrack is great too, with music that is so underground, we can't even find it on iTunes. Plus, Tony Stonem is pretty much the epiphany of what every girl denies that want, but really crave most in a guy. I guess Sid's pretty sweet too. And god, these kids can party...

2. The Queen: Granite, the woman hated Diana, but people over there love her! The Royal Family has such crazy celebrity power over there its unbelievable. She's just so fancy and proper, you can't help but love her.

3. UK Office: Ricky Gervais. Enough said.

4. The Tube: This public transportation system is so far ahead of it's time, It'd take the CTA years to try and match up to it. The lines also have incredibly humorous names like "Jubilee" and "Picadilly." And if you go far enough on the Picadilly line, you'll arrive at Cockfosters, something that is definitely work snickering at. The coolest name on the Red Line is Argyle and that's in the middle of a crappy north side neighborhood. Cockfosters probably has loads of fun things to do. And would you rather hear someone say over an intercom numerous times in a jolly British accent "Mind the gap between the train and the platform" or in a dull, American accent "Doors closing?" Conclusion = Tube > The 'L'

5. Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings: I would love to see an American write a fantasy series as successful as J.K. Rowling or J.R.R Tolkien.

6. Marks and Spencer: An upscale grocer/department store! Where the hell do we have this in the US??

Bowie is goddamn fabulous.

7. Music...In General: Too many great artists have come out of the UK. Do I really need to list them?

8. Food and Drink (maybe not so much food...but they're working on it): Legally, if you are the age of 5 and in your home, with your parents, you can get shitty in England! Pubs are found everywhere, even in the most desolate of places. And despite the stigma that their cooking is horrendous, give a good Beef Stew or bangers and mash a try! If the Brits were given meat, potatoes, carrots and onions, they'd be able to create a masterpiece with it. That's talent.

So that's all I can think of, for now, I'm sure they'll be much more in the future. But anyway, back on track about the Royal wedding. Me and my girlfriends decided that we need to celebrate this occasion in the best way we "Yankee girls" can do. So we're getting all dressed up (preferably in an ensemble that reflect Kate Middleton's style) and go eat sushi and drink Andre champagne (although Korbel is better quality and not as expensive). We will then come back to our dorms, pass the fuck out in our fancy-ass clothes, then wake up at 3 am to watch coverage on the wedding, while sipping on tea and crumpets that I plan to pick up from Whole Foods sometime this week.

You may think its pathetic, I call it a celebration of another culture's traditions. And an excuse to get schwasted.

until next time...
akp